The Last in Love

Discussion in 'Dallas Writers Room' started by Ray&Donna, Oct 27, 2017.

  1. Karin Schill
    Fine

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 12, 2016
    Message Count:
    2,977
    Trophy Points:
    4,333
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sweden
    Ratings:
    +5,883
    Original Member Since:
    September 2004
    What a cute update with Margaret and her grandparents. She's only 11 and yet she keeps surprising her grandparents. I bet they hadn't expected her to be such a little shark at poker! :lol:

    I like that you got a mention of Andrew Dowling in too!
    Just after I had mentioned how it was weird they never mentioned him.
     
    • Like Like x 2
  2. Ms Southworth
    Fine

    Ms Southworth Soap Chat TV Fanatic

    Member Since:
    Dec 27, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,514
    Trophy Points:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas Wonderland
    Ratings:
    +2,356
    Outstanding kitchen scene with Miss Ellie, Clayton, and Margaret! :jolly: 10 out of 10 points from me! :loveit: I liked the setting and the dialogue! :kiss: And let's not forget the mentioning of Miss Ellie's famous chili! :wink@

    I really like the way you're writing the character of Margaret! Somehow, she's just like I imagined Donna's daughter would be! Very mature and smart for her age, including topics in regards to topics that children her own age couldn't care less about! :yep: And, of course, Margaret's not into watching television, which she most likely considers a waste of time! Excellent writing work! :wink@

    LOL ... :lol: ... of course, Clayton doesn't want to take on Margaret in another board game! :D I loved Margaret's counter comment: “Grandpa, are you familiar with the term ‘sore loser’?:lolo: (PS. I added "you" in the qoute, as I imagined this word to be missing in your scene! Please hit me, if I'm mistaken! :box:)

    Somehow, I'm not at all surprised that Margaret knows how to play poker! It goes very well with the type of upbringing that I imagine her to have had with Donna in Washington! :dance:

    I was pleasantly surprised that Margaret is a great card shuffler as well! It gives her persona some edge! :think: And I like it! :loveit:

    Clayton's response to Margaret's proposal of a poker game was such a "grandfatherly" thing to say: “That’s an awfully big game for someone so young.:fantastic:

    I got a good chuckle out of Clayton's comments:
    • I don’t know how I get myself into these things. I’m telling you Ellie, [Margaret's] a shark.:giggle:
    • But after [Margaret's] through with me, I may not have a leg to stand on!:lolo:

    I loved the part of their conversation about who's got the most money - whether it be real money or not! :D

    You did an awesome job with the way you wrote the character of Miss Ellie:
    • She’s got you over a barrel there, Clayton.:Clol:
    • She’s definitely keeping you on your toes.:wink@
    Somehow, I think that comments like these ones may come mighty close to something Barbara Bel Geddes could have said herself, if she'd been in similar circumstances! :giggle: She was quite a character ... and a funny lady to hang around with (or so I've heard)! :)

    How sweet that Margaret asked if her grandparents would be at Southfork for Christmas! :ss7: I imagine that she just loves having a large family ... and especially having loving grandparents like Miss Ellie and Clayton! :kiss:

    Please continue with this fanfic! :clap: Please entertain us some more! :spinning: Please update soon! :best:
     
    Last edited: Dec 27, 2017
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  3. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat Addict

    Member Since:
    Sep 13, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,149
    Trophy Points:
    2,396
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Kentucky, USA
    Ratings:
    +2,013
    Original Member Since:
    January 2006
    Pillow Talk

    Ray smiled as he felt Donna kiss the side of his face.

    “Ready for another round?”

    “Not just yet—I’d hate to wear you out, cowboy. I’m just getting you broke in again.” She tickled his ear with the tip of her finger.

    He tilted his head to face her. “What did I ever do without you?”

    She gave him a crooked smile. “Without,” she replied.

    She propped herself up to face him, and she began to rub his firm bicep with her hand. He pulled her closer, so that she was able to rest her chin on his chest. He gazed into her eyes and ran his hand through her hair. “What would you think about moving in?”

    She looked at him thoughtfully. “I don’t know if that would be right. What would Margaret say?”

    “Well, you wouldn’t have to move into my room—you could use your regular one down the hall. You know, the one you never actually sleep in!”

    She poked him in the side of his stomach. “Are you teasing me?”

    “No, I’m serious. You two should move in. You already spend most of your time here anyway.”

    She studied his face. “Why don’t we give it a few more days? Let’s wait until after Margaret starts school, then we’ll move in gradually. I just don’t want to rush this.”

    He smiled at her. “Well I do—I want to be with you. But if I’ve waited this long, I can wait another week or two.”

    “That’s the spirit. Now show me again how much you’ve waited.” He took her into his arms and they continued making up for lost time.
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Cyber Hug Cyber Hug x 1
  4. Karin Schill
    Fine

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 12, 2016
    Message Count:
    2,977
    Trophy Points:
    4,333
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sweden
    Ratings:
    +5,883
    Original Member Since:
    September 2004
    Well considering the fact that they've just gotten engaged I'd say moving in together is the next logical step. :)
     
    • Like Like x 1
  5. Ms Southworth
    Fine

    Ms Southworth Soap Chat TV Fanatic

    Member Since:
    Dec 27, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,514
    Trophy Points:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas Wonderland
    Ratings:
    +2,356
    Great scene from Ray's king size bed! :kiss: It was very easy to imagine SK and SH acting out this scene for real! :gotcha:

    Amazing dialogue between Ray and Donna! :jolly: My favorite part of it has to be the part that made me smile and chuckle the most: :) :giggle:
    • Ready for another round?:wink@
    • Not just yet—I’d hate to wear you out, cowboy. I’m just getting you broke in again.:p

    I love that Ray suggested that they move in together! :) Being 11 years old, Margaret should definitely be included, not only in the discussion of when their family should all live under one roof, but also in the planning of the wedding and such. It seems like Ray and Donna may end up with a rather short engagement (and thus skip getting engagement rings all together), so the three of them need to take time picking out wedding bands, the type of wedding they want, clothes to go with it, a honeymoon, and so forth! :spinning:

    I can't wait to see where this fan fic is going! :dance: Please update soon! :clap: And have a great New Year's Eve! :ny2:
     
    • Like Like x 1
  6. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat Addict

    Member Since:
    Sep 13, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,149
    Trophy Points:
    2,396
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Kentucky, USA
    Ratings:
    +2,013
    Original Member Since:
    January 2006
    August 19, 1998

    The next week and a half passed briskly as Ray and Donna prepared for their wedding and Margaret prepared for her first day at her new school. The more time they spent together as a family, the more comfortable they all became with the idea. As she watched them together, Donna was sometimes taken aback by just how much alike Ray and Margaret were. The same mannerisms, habits, expressions—it was all pretty remarkable for two people who had spent so many years apart—and yet to her it made complete sense. Since it was going to be an important day, she and Ray had already decided to meet beforehand and then take Margaret to school together. That morning, Donna woke Margaret up before she went downstairs to fix breakfast. Before she started, and while Margaret was still getting ready, she went to call Ray.

    Ray had already been out riding that morning. He needed to be alone, and the cool morning air helped him to collect his thoughts. He was sad to see their summer coming to an end, but eager for the next phase of his life to begin. He wanted to be a good husband and father, someone his family could depend on to be there for them. He watched the sun rise, and then put his horse in the stables before going back inside. He had just finished cleaning up when the phone rang.

    He picked it up, already knowing who it was. “Good morning, Donna.”

    “Good morning, cowboy.”

    “So how is everything going? Is Margaret ready for today?”

    “I think so. How are you?”

    “Do I get to spend the day with you?”

    “Yes, you do.”

    “Then I’m great.”

    She laughed. “Me too. Can you do me a favor? I need a ride into town after we drop Margaret off.”

    “Sure. What do you wanna do after that?”

    “I don’t know. I’ll let you decide.”

    “Do you wanna mess around?”

    “Haven’t you asked me that before?”

    Ray laughed. “Yeah, I guess I have.”

    “Well, the answer’s the same, then,” Donna assured him.

    “Great. I’ll see you in just a little while.”

    “I can’t wait. Bye, Ray.”

    “Bye, Donna.”

    Ray thought about Donna as he drove toward her house. She was always the one who stabilized him, who made him see his life for what it could be—even if he was too stubborn to realize it. She was the one who had shown him that he could love someone else, and have them return that same love. She had tried her hardest to teach him about what was important in life, and he had finally accepted it.

    When he arrived, he found Donna and Margaret having breakfast in the kitchen.

    “Hey, partner.”

    “Hey, daddy.” She jumped up and hugged him. “Come have breakfast with us.”

    “I’ll just have some coffee, thanks.”

    “What is it about people in Texas only wanting to have coffee for breakfast?” Margaret inquired. “Mama fixed pancakes and everything. The least you can do is have something to eat.”

    Donna laughed. “It looks like your daughter has overruled you.”

    Ray sat down at the table. “Where did she learn to be so persuasive?” He smiled at Donna.

    She winked at him. “Oh, I don’t know. I guess she takes after me.” They continued making eyes at each other. Margaret stared at them curiously.

    “Not to interrupt your moment or anything, but I need some more syrup.”

    Ray continued to gaze at Donna. “Get it yourself, kid.” Finally he made his move and kissed her. Margaret shook her head at them and went for the pantry.

    “I’m going to be putting the house on the market soon. I won’t need it anymore in a few more weeks.”

    “Uh-huh,” Ray said. “I can’t wait.” They kissed again as Margaret came back in the kitchen.

    “I guess this is what I have to look forward to. But seriously, you two are acting like a couple of teenagers.”

    Ray smiled. “Remind me why we had a kid again?”

    Donna caressed the side of his face as she looked at him. “Because we wanted one really, really badly. Just not one this sarcastic.”

    Margaret gave them a perturbed look while eating. Donna finally noticed her. “Margaret, don’t frown so much. It’s the first day of school. Anyway, I need to finish getting ready, so I’ll leave you to talk.”

    “Hurry back,” Ray said as she left the room. She smiled back at him.

    Ray and Margaret ate in silence for a few minutes before he decided to say something. “So…first day of school?”

    Margaret looked up from her eggs and smiled. “Isn’t that why you came to pick me up this morning?”

    “Yeah, I guess it is. I just hope you’re not too nervous. The Braddock school system is really good.”

    “I know…but I think you came to see mama more than you came to see me.” She smiled at him with that all-too-familiar mischievous grin.

    “Maybe so, but I always want to see you. You’re the best kid I could ever ask for.”

    “I love you, Daddy.

    “I love you, too.”

    Donna then returned. “Ready to go?” she asked both of them.

    “I’m ready.” Margaret jumped out of her chair. “Now where is my backpack?”

    “It’s already in the car,” Donna informed her. “Ready to go, cowboy?”

    “Yes, ma’am.” He smiled at her. They held hands as they followed Margaret outside.

    She turned to face them before she hopped in the backseat. “Okay, there will be no kissing or hugging in front of the school. It’s now or never.”

    “I’ll take my hug now, then.” Ray bent down and hugged her. “Good luck today, partner.”

    Donna then bent down to kiss her daughter on the cheek. “Okay, time to go.” And with that, they got inside and headed down the road.

    A little while later, with Margaret dropped off at school—she was able to let go much easier than her parents—Ray and Donna headed for Dallas.

    “So what did you need to come into the city for?”

    ‘Well, you know how we’re getting married in a few weeks?”

    “Yeah, I seem to remember that.”

    “Well, I already have a dress. Which means, of course, that you need to be measured for your tuxedo.”

    “Seriously?”

    “Seriously. You can’t just get married as is.”

    “Okay then. But this better be worth it.”

    “Oh, I promise I’ll make it worth your while. Remember, patience is a virtue."
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  7. Karin Schill
    Fine

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 12, 2016
    Message Count:
    2,977
    Trophy Points:
    4,333
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sweden
    Ratings:
    +5,883
    Original Member Since:
    September 2004
    Very cute family update. :)
    I guess Margaret is at the age when watching her parents kissing can be slightly embarrassing...
     
    • Agree Agree x 1
    • Funny Funny x 1
  8. Ms Southworth
    Fine

    Ms Southworth Soap Chat TV Fanatic

    Member Since:
    Dec 27, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,514
    Trophy Points:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas Wonderland
    Ratings:
    +2,356
    Amazing update about wedding preparations and 1st day at a new school! :spinning:

    I loved the part about how the three of them are becoming a tight-knit family! :hug:I also loved how much alike father and daughter are when it comes down to it! :gotcha:

    I'm a lot like Ray in this fanfic! :) I like to enjoy the fresh early morning air ... ... clearing my mind while I'm doing some kind of physical activity! :hat:

    I had to read these two sentences over and over several times as they just said so much: "[Ray] was sad to see their summer coming to an end, but eager for the next phase of his life to begin. He wanted to be a good husband and father, someone his family could depend on to be there for them." :clap:

    Great conversation between Ray and Donna! :gotcha: And may I say that I love it when Ray jokes around:
    • Do I get to spend the day with you? ... ... Then I’m great.:giggle:

    • Do you wanna mess around?:D

    The description of Ray's thoughs when he drove to Donna's house was just amazing: "She was always the one who stabilized him, who made him see his life for what it could be—even if he was too stubborn to realize it. She was the one who had shown him that he could love someone else, and have them return that same love. She had tried her hardest to teach him about what was important in life, and he had finally accepted it." :dance:

    Great conversation between the three of them at the breakfast table! Very entertaining! :bowing

    I laughed out loud at a couple of Margaret's comments seeing her parents making out:
    • Not to interrupt your moment or anything, but I need some more syrup.:p

    • I guess this is what I have to look forward to. But seriously, you two are acting like a couple of teenagers.:kiss:

    I have no doubt that Ray - with Donna's help - will look very handsome at their upcoming wedding! :kiss:

    I'm looking forward not only to Ray and Donna's wedding day but also their wedding night! Also, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Bobby will have found Pam and brought back to Southfork, so the entire family will be united once again on Ray and Donna's special day! :jolly:

    Please update soon! :best:
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  9. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat Addict

    Member Since:
    Sep 13, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,149
    Trophy Points:
    2,396
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Kentucky, USA
    Ratings:
    +2,013
    Original Member Since:
    January 2006
    That's the other story :D ;)

    ***

    With the fitting out of the way, they spent the early afternoon lying in the bed. Ray nibbled on her ear and she laughed.

    “Didn’t I tell you I’d make it worth your while?”

    Ray rolled over so that he was on top of her. “Well, you didn’t lie.” He kissed her and then nibbled on her lip. She smiled as he ran his hand through her hair.

    “Want me to make it worth your while again?”

    “Uh-huh.”

    “Come on then, cowboy. I’ve got to take you back to school soon, but that doesn’t mean I can’t teach you a few things right now.” She moaned softly as he entered her. He kissed her both softly and intensely, in the way only he could, as she ran her hands all over his body, touching him in places that only she knew to touch. He quickened his pace and she grasped him tightly as she felt his release inside of her.
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  10. Ms Southworth
    Fine

    Ms Southworth Soap Chat TV Fanatic

    Member Since:
    Dec 27, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,514
    Trophy Points:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas Wonderland
    Ratings:
    +2,356
    Sorry, I'm so embarrassed! :embarrass: I realize that it may not appear so, but I really try hard not to get your fanfics mixed up! But I guess that it's to no avail! :frustration: Please forgive me! :fp:
     
    Last edited: Jan 9, 2018
    • Cyber Hug Cyber Hug x 1
  11. Ms Southworth
    Fine

    Ms Southworth Soap Chat TV Fanatic

    Member Since:
    Dec 27, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,514
    Trophy Points:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas Wonderland
    Ratings:
    +2,356
    Cute update from the bedroom! :swing:

    Ray and Donna's short conversation made me smile, as it said so much:
    • “Didn’t I tell you I’d make it worth your while?” :cool1
    • “Well, you didn’t lie.” :p
    • “Want me to make it worth your while again?” ;)
    • “Uh-huh.” :dance:
    • “Come on then, cowboy. I’ve got to take you back to school soon, but that doesn’t mean I can’t teach you a few things right now.” :jumpingsnow: :kiss:

    Please update soon! :bowing. :best:
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  12. Karin Schill
    Fine

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 12, 2016
    Message Count:
    2,977
    Trophy Points:
    4,333
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sweden
    Ratings:
    +5,883
    Original Member Since:
    September 2004
    :Clol:
     
    • Funny Funny x 1
  13. Ray&Donna

    Ray&Donna Soap Chat Addict

    Member Since:
    Sep 13, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,149
    Trophy Points:
    2,396
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Kentucky, USA
    Ratings:
    +2,013
    Original Member Since:
    January 2006
    August 22, 1998

    Donna looked over her manuscript for what seemed like the hundredth time. Naturally there would be further revisions, but having been out of the writing game for so long, she wanted to make a good impression. What she had written was coherent, it was true to Andrew, and was honest. Finishing the book was like closing the chapter on this part of her life, a time that was happy if not completely fulfilled. She was lost deep in thought when a voice interrupted her.

    “Mama, what’re you doing?”

    She turned to face her daughter. “I was just looking over this manuscript one last time before I mail it to the publisher.”

    Margaret smiled. “You should let me read it.”

    “I don’t think you’d find it very interesting. All of that political stuff can be kind of dry and boring.”

    “Well, I lived part of it—how boring could it be?” She reassured.

    Donna laughed. “You’ve got a point there.” She looked at Margaret pensively. “Do you ever miss him?”

    “I do sometimes. It seems weird that I can’t see him anymore, since he was such a big part of my life.”

    “That’s how I feel, too. He really did love you like you were his own.”

    “I know,” she replied. After thinking about something for a moment, she asked her own question. “How did you meet Andrew?”

    “Well, it was kind of a chance meeting. I was working on the oil lobby, trying to help stabilize the price per barrel. He was one of the senators I had to convince that my goals were worthwhile.” She motioned toward the couch. “Come sit beside me.”

    Margaret sat down and continued the discussion. “So you met him in Washington?”

    “Yes—in those days I commuted back and forth. Not the easiest thing for a pregnant woman to do, but I felt it was important.”

    “How did Daddy feel about it?”

    Donna frowned. “Well, he didn’t approve. We had hit a rough patch, and all we did was continue to hurt each other. There was a disconnect between what was being said and what was understood. There was a divide and there just wasn’t a way for us to live together anymore.”

    Margaret looked puzzled. “That’s kind of confusing—could you clarify your point?”

    Donna laughed. “What are you, a lawyer?” She then smiled. “I’ll try to simplify it. We couldn’t be what the other wanted—or needed—at that time. Do you understand?”

    “I think so.”

    “So we both found people who would give us what we needed then. It didn’t mean we didn’t love each other anymore, it just meant that it didn’t seem right to stay together just because there was a baby on the way. That’s why you were born in Washington. The divorce was already final, and I had moved there permanently. It was a hard decision, but I did what I thought was best for our future. It seems silly now, doesn’t it?”

    Margaret placed her hand on Donna’s. “It’s not silly—just kind of sad. But the good news is that all of that is the past.”

    “Thanks honey. You’re right, of course. Okay, I have to take this to the post office. I know you want to come.”

    “Of course—then again, I’ll do anything to keep from having to do homework.”

    “Did you finish packing up your room?” They had discussed moving to Ray’s house for good after her first day of school.

    “Yes, but I didn’t have that much. Almost everything is over there already, since that’s where we spend so much time.”

    Donna smiled to herself. “Well, we do spend a lot of time there, but I know your daddy enjoys it.”
     
    • Like Like x 1
    • Winner Winner x 1
  14. Ms Southworth
    Fine

    Ms Southworth Soap Chat TV Fanatic

    Member Since:
    Dec 27, 2016
    Message Count:
    1,514
    Trophy Points:
    1,117
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Dallas Wonderland
    Ratings:
    +2,356
    Beautiful mother/daughter scene! :spinning:

    I'm glad that Donna was able to finish her manuscript! I just love this sentence: "Finishing the book was like closing the chapter on this part of her life, a time that was happy if not completely fulfilled."

    Margaret really IS the daughter of a politician: :giggle:
    • Margaret: “You should let me read it.” :)
    • Donna: “I don’t think you’d find it very interesting. All of that political stuff can be kind of dry and boring. :mo:
    • Margaret: “Well, I lived part of it—how boring could it be?” :lol:

    Sweet talk about Andrew and the time when the three of them were a family! :hat:And it was a nice summary of how Donna and Andrew met! :jolly:

    My favorite parts of this scene are Donna's superb responses to her daughter's questions:
    • Well, he didn’t approve. We had hit a rough patch, and all we did was continue to hurt each other. There was a disconnect between what was being said and what was understood. There was a divide and there just wasn’t a way for us to live together anymore.:gotcha:
    • So we both found people who would give us what we needed then. It didn’t mean we didn’t love each other anymore, it just meant that it didn’t seem right to stay together just because there was a baby on the way. That’s why you were born in Washington. The divorce was already final, and I had moved there permanently. It was a hard decision, but I did what I thought was best for our future. It seems silly now, doesn’t it?:clap:

    Margaret just cracks me up: :giggle:
    • That’s kind of confusing—could you clarify your point?:lmao:
    • What are you, a lawyer? ... ... :lol: ... ... I’ll try to simplify it. We couldn’t be what the other wanted—or needed—at that time. ... ...;)

    Yet, Margaret is also extremely mature for her age: "Margaret placed her hand on Donna’s. “It’s not silly—just kind of sad. But the good news is that all of that is the past.:spinning:

    10 out of 10 points from me! :jum:Excellent writing! :j1:

    Please update soon! :best:
     
  15. Karin Schill
    Fine

    Karin Schill Super Moderator Staff Member

    Member Since:
    Sep 12, 2016
    Message Count:
    2,977
    Trophy Points:
    4,333
    Gender:
    Female
    Location:
    Sweden
    Ratings:
    +5,883
    Original Member Since:
    September 2004
    I really like that Margaret and Donna talked about Andrew and also Donna's new book. It was good to get to know how Margaret feel about all this. :)
     

Users Who Have Read This Thread (Total: 4)

Share This Page