SoapLand - The Battle Of The Bitch-slaps - The Result

Discussion in 'SoapLand - The Battles' started by Richard Channing, Jul 18, 2019.

  1. Willie Oleson

    Willie Oleson SoapLand Battles Moderator

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    Because of the fabulous A Summer Place gif posted by Richard, I've decided to vote for the most entertaining slap as my #1

    1. Claudia vs. Sammy Jo vs. Claudia - DYNASTY
    The no holds barred, quasi-"Kill Bill" style exchange of bitch-slaps has become the stuff of soap legends.

    2. Alexis slaps Krystle - DYNASTY
    [​IMG]
    The expression "to add insult to injury" plays out in the most literal way possible. After all the things she's done to Krystle, she also has the nerve to bitch-slap her saintly nemesis.
    And that's when a bitch becomes a super-bitch.

    3. JR slaps Jeb Ames - DALLAS
    [​IMG]
    It's violent, totally unexpected and maybe the only occasion* when JR uses physical violence to show his authority (*feel free to correct me if I'm wrong)

    4. Karen slaps Abby - KNOTS LANDING
    [​IMG]
    Abby has received quite a few slaps, usually the result of teasing her opponents. But the comment about Laura was particularly vile, therefore I rank it as one of the most deserving slaps.

    5. Sable slaps Jeff - DYNASTY
    [​IMG]
    The Colbys didn't do the traditional Dynasty bitch-slaps, therefore this scene has a sense of unfinished business, and it's probably the best post-The Colbys scene on Dynasty.
    The spin-off show focused their rivalries on Sable vs Frankie, and Jeff vs Miles - but the core battle, especially in season 1, was Sable vs Jeff. It's funny that this should become more evident on the parent show.
     
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  2. Richard Channing

    Richard Channing Soap Chat Star

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    Abby gives really good 'slapped face'. But then she has had plenty of practice.
     
    Last edited: Jul 19, 2019
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  3. Daniel Avery

    Daniel Avery Super Moderator Staff Member

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    1. When Laura Slapped Abby, KL. Things had been brewing between those two for a while, and that confrontation (amidst a hostage situation, no less) set the tone for their relationship until Laura's untimely, sad death. Speaking of which...
    2. When Karen Slapped Abby, KL. Abby's crass comment about Laura prompted Karen to slap that name right out of Abby's mouth forever.
    3. When Eric Slapped Diana, KL. Because she really needed it. But the viewers needed it even more.
    4. When Richard Slapped Laura, KL. Laura felt trapped when she discovered she was pregnant with Daniel, since she had just resolved to leave Richard. In the heat of an argument she suggested having an abortion, and he slapped her. He immediately regretted it, saying "you said 'abortion' and I saw Jason," but it only served to remind the viewer that she had every reason to (still) want to leave.
    5. When Val Slapped Abby, KL. Let's face it: she was asking for it. Even Moronic Saint Val could only take so much baiting.
     
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  4. Angela Channing

    Angela Channing World Cup of Soaps Moderator

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    I completely forgot about this one probably because I normally (and I guess I'm showing sexism here) think about slaps being associated with female characters. This was one of the rare occasions when a man slapped another man which made it all the more shocking.
     
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  5. Richard Channing

    Richard Channing Soap Chat Star

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    Yes, the same goes for the great clip of Dusty slapping JR that Justine posted, which I had also forgotten about.
     
    Last edited: Jul 19, 2019
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  6. Alexis

    Alexis Soap Chat Warrior

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    I mean this one is the best yet. I am getting a gay boy soap loving head rush from all these bitch slaps. This is better than the Turban round! There are just so many to choose from. I'm working all weekend, so you can expect mine in on Monday some time.
     
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  7. Willie Oleson

    Willie Oleson SoapLand Battles Moderator

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    We'll put it on the agenda for the next board meeting:D
     
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  8. Carrie Fairchild

    Carrie Fairchild Soap Chat Well-Known Member

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    1 - Claudia and Sammy Jo's slapfest on Dynasty: three for the price of one in this scene and boy, did they go for it. Plus, they had good reason to be slapping the sh*t out of each other, unlike some later Dynasty showdowns.

    2 - Alexis slaps Krystle on Dynasty: the first slap that kick-started the increasingly ridiculous series of catfights that the show became renowned for.

    3 - Dominique slaps Alexis on Dynasty: this whole exchange is a hoot "Alexis, I forgot to thank you for your present" SMACK!! "It's he you should slap dear, not I".

    4 - Lilimae slaps Cathy on Knots Landing: I loved it anytime Lilimae went off on one and she sent Cathy away on her cross country tour with a few home truths and a smack in the face.

    5 - Karen slaps Abby on Knots Landing: probably the most "stagey" looking of the Knots slaps but as others have said, it was probably the most deserved as given Abby's comment about Laura.
     
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  9. Daniel Avery

    Daniel Avery Super Moderator Staff Member

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    At least Lilimae didn't 'do what needed to be done' and mow Cathy down with a car...
     
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  10. Victoriafan3

    Victoriafan3 Soap Chat Well-Known Member

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    Oh gosh this is hard. Great contest choice! Obviously Pam had some fantastic slap moments but so many others were great aswell!

    1. Pam slaps Gerald Kane - megawowdom!
    2. Pam slaps Katherine - at last!
    3. Pam slaps JR and he says God I hate that woman
    4. Pam slaps Sue Ellen
    5. Dusty slaps JR

    Dynasty had some real humdingers aswell. Claudia and Sammy Jo hit hard

    Also wanted to mention Sons and Daughters’ sisters, Patricia (Rowena Wallace) slaps Margaret (Ilona Rodgers) but straight away Margaret hits her back. Very powerful

    Also near the end of RTE , off screen the actresses giggling and profusely apologising to each other, Stephanie slaps Jilly and then Jilly goes to slap her back but Stephanie stops her by grab her arm. Strong stuff!

    Agh, those were the days :)
     
    Last edited: Jul 20, 2019
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  11. Jock Og

    Jock Og Soap Chat Fan

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    This battle should be a landslide victory for DYNASTY, since they were the masters and mistresses of the slapping action.

    1) Alexis slaps Krystle in the studio: After Krystle discovers it was Alexis who fired the shot gun; which lead to her falling off Champ (Krsytle's horse) the blonde one heads to the studio, with the same shotgun. To add insult to injury it wasn't merely the fall and being dragged by the horse but the fact Krystle lost her first baby to Blake. Of course Alexis denies doing the deed and slaps Krystle for accusing her. What happens next is a barrel of laughs as the current Mrs. Carrington and the ex Mrs. Carrington go hell for leather; a full blown cat fight c/w pillow feathers, flower vases being smashed and the ripping of each other's frocks. With Alexis down on the floor; exhausted and probably regretting the slap, her nemesis leaves the studio with a parting shot: "If you want a rematch, just whistle. If you can! - DYNASTY.

    2) A slap it out between Sammy Jo and Claudia: Krystle's hot headed niece (Sammy Jo) and bi polar Claudia discuss Steven, leading to a scene as to who can slap each other the hardest. Claudia ends up with the edge - DYNASTY.

    3) Pam strikes at Katherine: The evil but good looking witch that Katherine was, had this coming to her. It was all over a letter Katherine claims J.R. made her write, to put the final nail in the coffin of Pam and Bobby's marriage. Pam gives a belter on the face to her kid sister, leaving the latter to fall onto her bed - DALLAS.

    4) Dominique provides Alexis with a present: The character so central to the Carrington world is at it again. This time she is meddling in her new rival Dominique's love life and so Blake's sister gives her a smacking present. Needless to say Alexis has the last word - DYNASTY.

    5) Gabrielle wallops Angela: The Tuscany Land Corporation is going full tilt, at buying up wineries and vineyards. Chase's girlfriend Gabrielle lets Mrs. Channing know about the underhanded way she does business, when a hard slap on the cheek comes her way - FALCON CREST.


    Gabrielle Short bursts into Angela's study, before Chao-Li has a chance to stop her. She gives the Falcon Crest boss a hard smack, on the cheek and leaves the great mansion. A good picture and a good sound, (a scene from season 6, 1986 - '87):

    Chao-Li: "Oh, Mrs. Channing. I'm sorry! It happened so fast."

    Angela holds her hand over the slapped cheek and is perplexed. She says,

    "Oh never mind that ....... for another winery like hers I'd turn the other cheek."
     
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  12. Toni

    Toni Soap Chat Star

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    1- Pam slaps Kathy darling (Dallas: Hush...Hush, Sweet Jessie)
    2- Pam slaps J.R. (Dallas: Ewing Inferno)
    3- Melissa slaps Cole (Falcon Crest: Season 5)
    4- Eric slaps Diana (finally!!!) (KL: Season 5)
    5- Claudia & Sammy Jo´s bitchfest (Dynasty)
    5- Jenna slaps Charlie (Dallas)
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jul 26, 2019
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  13. Jimmy Todd

    Jimmy Todd Soap Chat Well-Known Member

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    1. Claudia slaps Sammy Joe. That looked like it hurt, and it knocked Sammy Joe back quite a bit. Claudia is not as fragile as she seems!
    2.Karen slaps Abby. The sheer nastiness of Abby's comment added so much gravitas to that scene.
    3.Eric slaps Diana. All the tension that led up to that scene made it so cathartic.
    4.Pam slapping JR. This added to the tension of the season finale. Also, the complexity of the characters here. Pam is not totally innocent in her actions, as JR rightly pointed out to her. That's why she slapped him. The truth hurts, and nobody was a saint in the fight for Ewing Oil, sorry Pam, but it's true. Dallas at its best.
    5. Alexis slaps Krystle. Alexis' audacity in slapping Krystle and the most fun catfight that ensued. Dynasty in all its campy but still clever glory.
     
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  14. Willie Oleson

    Willie Oleson SoapLand Battles Moderator

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    That's kind of how I view the Sable-slaps-Jeff slap. He's totally biased and has nothing to back up his accusations, but Sable is cunning enough to give those accusations some weight.
     
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  15. Jimmy Todd

    Jimmy Todd Soap Chat Well-Known Member

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    Jeff needed to be slapped for quite awhile, especially how he treated Kirby. I remember a scene where he is complaining to Krystle that Kirby is not over her father's death yet. Joseph had just committed suicide, and if I remember correctly, he was telling this to Krystle in the same episode as the funeral! I really wanted Krystle to slap him for that, or better yet, call Claudia over and tell her to mop the floor with Jeff. Claudia proved she's a brawler.
     
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  16. tommie

    tommie Soap Chat Star

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    I dunno
    I wish I could vote for this, because Torita is in good form for once:



    #Justice4Donna
     
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  17. Willie Oleson

    Willie Oleson SoapLand Battles Moderator

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    Would you be interested in starting a similar top5/top10/battle for the 90s soaps? Because these 80s battle threads will come to an end in the not-so-distant future.
    We'll try to stretch it to #100, but it's going to be tough.
     
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  18. tommie

    tommie Soap Chat Star

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    I dunno
    Nah, since there's basically two main soaps (90210 + Melrose) to choose from. Maybe if we included 00's soaps it could be a thing, hmm...
     
  19. tommie

    tommie Soap Chat Star

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    I dunno
    Also, the next thread should be about the TONGUE-LASHINGS.
     
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  20. Willie Oleson

    Willie Oleson SoapLand Battles Moderator

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    That doesn't mean they would always win. There was Models Inc and Pacific Palisades too!
    And the hottest hunk was definitely on 2000 Malibu Road.
    But it's just an idea, maybe we should discuss it with other forum members before we start something.
     
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