Emmerdale, funny lines.

[Emmerdalefan]

First EE now Corrie and now Emmerdale.

Seth to Amos "But the strippers have come all the way from Halifax".
Amos Brearly "i dont care if they have come from outer space. Get them out of here".

Amos "Nay Mr Wilks".

[Emmerdalefan]

Eric to Mandy "Poor Paddy. One day he'll wake up and realise he's married a vile, nagging inbred eyke, and if he's lucky maybe even tomorrow".

Amos Brearly "Put me on two wheels and you have got a wobble".

Alan Turner to Mrs Bates "You're quite right Mrs Bates, lets just knuckle down and have a right good session, err of work I mean".

[Canon]

Pollard - "It's Francis, isn't it?"

Butch - "Not if you want to keep your teeth."

[holeinmydonut]

sam dingle to tom king 'you're a proper nob.'

[holeinmydonut]

kelly and emily:

kelly: "but you're mother wasn't driven to her death"
emily: "no but she was driven to the hospital after she died"

[holeinmydonut]

kim tate bingo caller:

'chris tate's IQ, number 2'

[Canon]

Butch - "Lesbian."

Zoe - "Homosapien."

Butch - "I am not, you take that back."

[holeinmydonut]

hazel's most famous line played by the brilliant pauline quirke:

'its what jackson would have wanted. '

aaron/jackson before scattering clyde's ashes:


aaron: Did you get my text?

jackson: What the one that said i was out of order and you hope i get bird flu? Yeah.


charity to chas:

What's up with you? Are you competing with Diane for 'Spinster of the Year' Award?" classic.

[holeinmydonut]

diane about a plate of food that accidentally ended up on the floor: 'you can't serve that now! '

marlon: 'it's for shadrach.'

diane: 'fair enough. '

[holeinmydonut]

val - pointing to herself: 'steak.'
pointing to brenda: 'burger'.
pointing to herself: 'caviar.'
pointing to brenda: 'something a bit like caviar but no where near as good."
nikhil: "frog spawn."