So, me ole china, what's it like to be a walking cliché, Derek Branning?

[Emmerdalefan]

God when Speck shouted at Fatboi tonight telling him to jog on it was so nativity play and just shows what a cliched joke he is.

[holeinmydonut]

thats what i like about derek. its all ott and hes about as realistic as michelle collins manchester accent. but does it matter. im really enjoying watching the panto style eastend villain. i hope jamie stays in walford a while longer.

[Swami]

But the soaps should be much more reflective of real life than they are - realistically how many Derek Brannings are there about? I think it does a disservice to the communities portrayed by the soaps.

Swami

[Emmerdalefan]

But the soaps should be much more reflective of real life than they are - realistically how many Derek Brannings are there about? I think it does a disservice to the communities portrayed by the soaps.

Swami

Corrie and Emmie are more realistic than Easties in that respect. Phil, Derek and Michael would not survive 5 minutes in the real East End. Emmie and Corrie put it to shame sometimes.

[Hardraw Force]

Derek's crap cockney cor blimey gavnaa'-isms are just TOO overblown and IN YER FRIGGIN FACE to be convincing. This is why I loathe him. His face is in about every other fifth scene in most episodes. That's just overkill if you ask me.

When he kidnaps Alfie with help from his hired heavies by next week you just know it's gonna be yet another crap storyline.

[Emmerdalefan]

I hope Speck Bulldog Branning gets axed when the new producer takes over, and fast. What has he actually bought to the show? Just rubbish storylines and rubbish acting.

[holeinmydonut]

none of the big 3 are remotely realistic or based in the real world. corrie lives in its own little bubble and has not been in the real world since the late 60's. but thats why it works and why we love it.

emmerdale doesnt really know what it is, and what it stands for. if emmerdale hadnt changed from its original format, we wouldnt be talking about this show now!

ee has never portryaed a realistic slice of life in the eastend and has never claimed to, although in the early days it had more family units and was more community minded.

as ive said in previous threads, the only soap that was remotely realistic was brookside, but only in the early days, we wont mention the late 80s and early 90's.

[Swami]

Corrie and Emmie are more realistic than Easties in that respect. Phil, Derek and Michael would not survive 5 minutes in the real East End. Emmie and Corrie put it to shame sometimes.

But Corrie and Emmerdale aren't without fault on this score, either. Like I said before, I live in a rural area and there may be some similarities, but some of the things that go on in Emmerdale have no bearing on real life at all.

Swami

[Emmerdalefan]

Anyway back on Derek, tonight he continues to show his ugly bulldog face and his stupid gor blimey gavnaa mannerisms.

[Hardraw Force]

Quite.....and on went my mute button yet again....my, it's getting a lot of usage lately. He's lining up something very bad indeed for Alfie.....oh, I am wetting my pants with anticipation!!

[Swami]

Anyway back on Derek, tonight he continues to show his ugly bulldog face and his stupid gor blimey gavnaa mannerisms.

Couldn't they arrange a meeting between him, and Corrie's Dev and Sean?

Swami

[Emmerdalefan]

Speck's daughter is apparently coming into the show now so there does seem no plans for this joke to leave the show.

[holeinmydonut]

a bit of goods news for you, mr foreman will be in the southern soap until at least 2013, happy days.

[Ome]

Speck's daughter is apparently coming into the show now so there does seem no plans for this joke to leave the show.

Jasmyn Banks has been cast in the role of Alice, who turns up on Albert Square desperately searching for answers from the father she has never met.

[Emmerdalefan]

She must have got her looks from her mum then.

[Hardraw Force]

She looks NOTHING like her father - bet he isn't even her biological father anyway - not that THAT ever surprises us.

Derek's REAL biological kids are probably four legged brutes with very ugly faces who bite and snarl a lot....whilst wagging their tails incessantly.

[Swami]

She looks NOTHING like her father - bet he isn't even her biological father anyway - not that THAT ever surprises us.

Derek's REAL biological kids are probably four legged brutes with very ugly faces who bite and snarl a lot....whilst wagging their tails incessantly.

Don't forget the Brylcream, either.

Swami

[Hardraw Force]

It's not Brylcream, it's stale chippy grease.

[Swami]

It's not Brylcream, it's stale chippy grease.

Thanks for the correction!

Swami

[Emmerdalefan]

I have never rated Phil as a true hardman even though he can look after himself. But I was so glad when he floored Speck last night in the Vic. His ugly face will look even more ugly now, almost as ugly as Alan Sugar.