gay

[nwlman]

Hi can anyone give me some advise, I am gay and hate it, I have met a nice girl we have loads in common, but one problem I am gay, I was looking into conversion therepy has anyone heard of this. I just cant admit it to anyone I get angry when I am asked or read.

[nofoodleft]

i've read dozens of articles on this whole conversion therapy thing, and i personally don't think you should bother.

Conversion therapy can't change a person. I know this topic makes you angry but that's all for psychological reasons, and so is your homosexuality. Basically, if you like men in that way, nothing can really change that except for experimentation. I am gay myself, and also not very open about it. Only when people know me inside out they know im gay. You wouldnt think it straight off. The thing about conversion therapy is that these professionals basically say 'OK, now you're straight. Congratulations!' and that alone convinces their patients that they indeed are straight. Worse case scenario, you'll convince yourself for years, convince yourself you love a woman, get married to her and have 2.4 kids. Then you hit 40 and realise you've been lying to yourself and it'll all end very messy. Everybody, and i mean EVERYBODY in your life would prefer if you were gay and comfortable with it rather than pretending to be straight and subconsciously unhappy. I know you are unhappy about it right now. So was I. But things happened and my perspective changed.

Another thing, if you really like this girl and want to make it work, regardless of your sexual preference, who's stopping you? I'm gay and have had relationships with women. I fell in love with a girl years ago and the whole gay thing never came into it. Sex is a way of making someone happy, and if you ever fall in love with this girl you will want to make her happy, and sex is a beautiful way to do it. This need alone is enough, trust me.

However, you are a man, and men are known to have overwhelming sex drives no matter what sexuality they are. You say adamantly that you are gay, not bisexual or bi-curious, so that means being attracted to men will get in the way of your relationship. If you think conversion therapy is the way to go, i can't stop you. But i can warn you that you'll be wasting your time. Conversion therapy usually involves a lot of religous hoo-haa, and if the topic of being gay makes you as angry as you say, then this is not the answer for you.

Try it with this girl without conversion therapy, you'll probably be pleasantly surprised by the results.

[emmalovesdallas]

First off, does the girl know that your gay??? Perhaps your a bisexual homosexual (or the other way around, I can't remember). I know someone who was and is gay but fell in love with a woman, I suppose she was his exception. Anyway, they are happily married now and have a kid, (not that I'm suggesting that or anything, its just an example). If you really like the girl and she likes you I don't see any reason for you to not give it a go - don't cheat on her with a guy though that is never good!! Who knows, perhaps she's your exception!!

[nwlman]

Thanks for the good advice

[nwlman]

Thanks for the good advice i will sleep on it

[McGarrett .]

Dude go for it ...Why not...

I am a straight guy and I have had tons of man crushes!!

[nwlman]

I think I will go for it I really like her so why not she is good for me I think and besides we both want kids so this may be my only chance

[mztx71]

Are you sexually attracted to this girl?

[Mayor Gregory]

"Whatever Gets You Thru The Night" as John Lennon sang.

[emmalovesdallas]

I think I will go for it I really like her so why not she is good for me I think and besides we both want kids so this may be my only chance

Go for it. Good Luck!!!! :peace::dancegirl:peace:

[Dallasdaze]

Why do you hate being gay? That's like saying you hate yourself. I mean what's wrong with being gay? Why put off the truth? Why drag an innocent
woman into this picture only knowing what her fate will be in the future?
Why even contenplate having a sexual relationship with this woman and possibly bringing an innocent baby into this murky picture? Why? Is it to fullfill some deep seeded fantasy that you can have both worlds? To prove you aren't gay? Is this more self centered? Bottom line, you play you pay. However, it'll be her heart and the baby's if she gets pregnant. Now, can you live with this on your consience? What would this do to an innocent child's life? Think please about what you are doing.
You need to be happy with who you are my friend. You need to accept yourself. I accept you! I also believe in you! Now, go out and find Mr. Right
that handsome devil and have a steamy hot time... Do your thing and be proud of you!!! Don't let anyone make you feel bad for being you!! That also includes family members. You could benefit from getting into a support group.
Check out the web and see also what's available in your area. It's time you start feeling good about you and your being GAY!!!

[Garrison]

Are you sure you're gay and not bisexual?

[Mel O'Drama]

You need to be happy with who you are my friend. You need to accept yourself. I accept you! I also believe in you! Now, go out and find Mr. Right
that handsome devil and have a steamy hot time... Do your thing and be proud of you!!! Don't let anyone make you feel bad for being you!! That also includes family members. You could benefit from getting into a support group.
Check out the web and see also what's available in your area. It's time you start feeling good about you and your being GAY!!!

Excellent advice nwlman.

It all starts with you, and when you're comfortable with yourself, the rest will fall into place.

Please try not to make being gay a bedroom issue. As I'm sure you know, if you're gay, you know it. It doesn't matter whether you sleep with men, women or nobody at all. You know who you are, and no external factors (including sex with women or aversion therapy) will change who you are. Far too many people have learned this the hard way.

So work on being happy with you, look up a gay support group/youth group in your area, and take things one step at a time.